It’s a crisp 30 degrees out on a clear and sunny day in the backwoods of North Carolina. I’m standing in formation, having just finished the combat physical fitness test. A series of events to test any candidate’s physical fitness, will, and determination. Though the test was physically demanding, I’m not tired. I know I did well. I was one of the few in my group that could carry Randy the Rap…let’s just call him Randy. A life-size dummy that weighs over 100 lbs. Anyways, I was able to successfully finish the event in which you carry Randy on one shoulder down the lane, place him on the other shoulder, and come back.
Yeah, I was feeling confident. I was feeling good. Real good.
They just finished calling out all the roster numbers that didn’t score high enough on the written tests. I didn’t hear my number. All I was thinking about was the next phase: Land navigation. But then:
“Listen up! If you hear your roster number called out, form a separate formation over there! To my left, you’re right!”
And there it was: “76!”
My heart fucking sank. All of a sudden, I felt weak at the knees. I couldn’t even break ranks properly. I was in shock. What did I do? What didn’t I do?
Land navigation was now the last thing on my mind. Now, I’m assessing the situation. “Who’s all in this newly formed formation? Do they seem high-speed? Wait. There are a bunch of high-speed dudes in the other formation that didn’t get called out. FUUUUUCK! What’s happening?!”
As you may have guessed, I didn’t get to move on to the next phase of Special Forces Assessment and Selection (SFAS). I was an “involuntary withdrawal.” When I asked for some guidance, the SGM said, “I can’t say much other than, figuroeut what’s wrong, fix it, and come back.”
Brother, what?
Lost My Way
Look, here’s the deal: I’m not someone who carries a lot of discipline these days. I have certainly lost my way. And buddy, I am LOST. Let me be honest: I’ve had incredible discipline. I’ve also lost it. More than once. Especially when it comes to my weight-loss journey.
I’ve dropped weight. Put it back on. Got back on track. Fallen off again. Some days I’m dialed in—tracking macros, meal prepping, hitting my workouts. Other days, I’m eating like I never learned anything. The gap between who I want to be and what I’m doing feels huge. This same lack of discipline is a huge reason—no pun intended—why I left the army. That story will eventually come.
Anyways, it messes with you. Because when you’ve known discipline—lived it—you don’t have the excuse of ignorance. You know what you’re capable of. You’ve proven it to yourself. So when you slip, it hits harder. It’s not just about body weight—it’s about self-respect. I guess I’m partially writing this article to remind myself that I was that guy. I just need to get back there.
What is Discipline?
I posted that story at the beginning of the article to highlight a couple of things:
- You need to have discipline to achieve goals, especially challenging ones like attending SFAS
- No matter how much discipline you exercise, it’s not always going to work out in your favor.
But how do you become disciplined if you’re lacking it?
First, let’s define the word:
Well, there are a few different answers, according to Merriam-Webster:
- a: control gained by enforcing obedience or order
b: orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior
c: self-control
- Punishment
- training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character
- a field of study
- a rule or system of rules governing conduct or activity
That’s a lot of definitions for one word, right? (Actually, if you think that’s a lot, look up the word: run)
But for this post, we’re sticking with the third one—the one about training, molding, and perfecting your mindset and your moral character.
Now, back to the question: How do you become disciplined? Well, if you were fortunate enough to be born into and raised by a Mexican family (or a strict one for that matter), it’s instilled in you real quick. Then, of course, there’s also the military. After day 0 of reception, you learn discipline rather quickly. But what if neither one of those applies to you? Well, here is the best advice I can give:
- Set goals
- Create structure
- Delay gratification
- Do hard things on purpose
- Eliminate temptation
- Track progress
Set Goals
One of the best ways to learn discipline without enlisting in the military or law enforcement, or having a chancla (slipper) thrown at you, is by setting goals. Goals and discipline are like two sides of the same coin.
When setting goals, they don’t have to be big and grand. It can be something simple and manageable. Over time, you will start to develop goals that are much more ambitious and difficult to achieve. But for now, start with something small.
Remember, without goals, discipline can feel like punishment. But when you have something you’re chasing—something real—discipline becomes the vehicle that gets you there. Goals break the big picture into daily decisions. You’re not just waking up early for no reason—you’re training. You’re not just eating clean to impress anyone—you’ve got a target. And every small win, every checkbox you hit, builds momentum. That momentum turns into identity. Suddenly, you’re not trying to be disciplined—you are.
A goal also keeps you honest. It shows you the gap between what you say you want and what you’re doing. And yeah, that can sting. But that tension? That’s where discipline gets built.
Structure
Discipline thrives on routine. Having a set schedule, even a loose one, eliminates decision fatigue and reduces the chances of slacking. Wake-up time. Workout time. Planning time. It doesn’t have to be rigid, it just has to be consistent.
Delay Gratification
Train yourself to wait. Whether it’s food, comfort, or distractions—pushing back on instant rewards builds your self-control over time. Skip the Netflix binge until after your workout. Hold off on scrolling until your writing is done. Every time you say “not yet” instead of “right now,” you’re reinforcing discipline.
Do Hard Things On Purpose
Seek out discomfort. Discipline grows in resistance. Cold showers, tough workouts, uncomfortable conversations. You don’t rise to the occasion, you fall back on your training. So train hard. Instead of walking 10,000 steps, make it 10,500. Instead of skipping cardio for the day, figure out a way to throw in 30 minutes of walking on an incline. Purposely go out of your way to find discomfort.
Eliminate Temptation
Sometimes, it’s not about being stronger, it’s about being smarter. Create an environment that supports your goals. Don’t keep junk food in the house if you’re trying to cut. Turn off notifications when you need to focus. You can’t always rely on willpower, but you can set yourself up for success.
Track Progress
Seeing your progress, even if it’s slow, keeps your fire lit. Whether it’s journaling (I highly recommend this one), checking off habits, or logging workouts, progress fuels discipline. It’s proof you’re moving forward. And that feeling? Addictive.
Not Enough
Going back to my SFAS story, what did it take for me to get there? Look, I was never a real “go-getter” or “high-speed” soldier. I always had ambitions to go to schools like Sapper, Ranger, or SFAS. But that’s all it was, ambitions. When I finally decided to pull the trigger and go to SFAS, I locked in.
I developed a training plan to put me into what I thought was the best shape to be successful. I decided I needed to cut about 8-10 pounds, so I set up my macros and executed them. For the next 4 to 5 months, I pushed myself like I never had. I stuck to my plan. Yes, I would make fine-tune adjustments, but I never deviated.
When I got to Fort Bragg, I was feeling really good. When it came to the individual events, I was in the middle of the pack but towards the front.
I was able to maintain focus and discipline throughout my training, and in the end, it wasn’t enough. Sometimes, there will be outside factors that play a major role in achieving your goals. We shouldn’t let that deter us from pursuing any other goals.
My main issue was that I didn’t know how to handle that rejection. It took me a while to bounce back. In a way, that’s what I’m going through right now. Only now, it has taken longer to recover. COVID-19 was the first domino that fell and led to a series of events that I’m still trying to recover from.
Closing
I’ll admit, it’s a bit ironic for someone who lacks discipline to talk about how to get it. Makes me sound like I’m full of shit. To be completely honest, even as I’m typing all of this out, I’m still having difficulties. But I am making a continuous effort to get back on track. This whole blog is part of that process.
What else am I doing to get my head out of my ass and back on track? I’m following those five steps that I mentioned.
In the next article that I will publish, I will talk about the company that you keep. It will highlight the importance of surrounding yourself with like-minded individuals. Your team. That’s also an important part of maintaining discipline and becoming successful.
I’ll catch y’all on the next hilltop.
